Tiger also lost points by delivering used up and general phrases we’ve heard before. Go back to the speeches of John Edwards,  Mark Sanford or Eliot Spitzer. There was little specific about their apology or what they plan to do going forward. They all say how they let down their family, their country and their fans. Wake up! You’re not telling us anything new.

The only real emotion Tiger displayed was defending Elin. But for a study in emotion, pushed just under the surface, take a look at Tiger’s mother watching her son speak. I would have loved to hear what she was thinking. Now that would be memorable.

Bad reviews come in many forms; our clients all have a story about when they were embarrassed in front of a class, an assembly, or in church as a young person and still carry the scars. Some confront the challenge and go on to be masterful communicators and speakers, while others retreat and avoid public speaking for the rest of their lives. It is imperative that we develop a metric for assessing our communication skills, and also a trust in our ability to make the assessment, without the influence of others. Fine-tuning listening/awareness skills while presenting takes time, but once you can feel the reaction of the audience in the moment and adjust as needed, you will never again carry the albatross of a bad review about your neck.

If you’re going to name the people who you owe a debt of gratitude to, add descriptive phrases of what they’ve meant to you or the specifics of what they’ve done. Select only a choice few, because there’s not enough time to include everyone. Jason Reitman (the Director of “Up in the Air”) was exemplary. He was open, not self conscious and touching, while brief.

We love Drew Barrymore, but she seemed too much like the role she played in Grey Gardens when she tossed out phrases like “I’m not good at this” and “I can do this” and “Monique, I want to be like you” and “Because of all the things going on in the world, I know it’s important.” What a wasted opportunity. Emotional but ineffective.

Please eliminate these phrases: “this is amazing” and “I’m not prepared”. The producer of Mad Men used both of these tired phrases but then redeemed himself by acknowledging that he (like Drew Barrymore) was in this ballroom many years ago for a Bar Mitzvah, which endeared him to the audience and allowed him to finish strong.

Know when you’re done and it’s time to exit. Meryl Streep had some terrific endings to her speech, but she kept going on which diminished her great lines like “I’ve played so many extraordinary women, that I’m now mistaken for one”. Or, “I want to change my name to T-Bone. T-Bone Streep.” Formulate one idea and stick with it. Then button it up with a strong close and make a gracious exit…

Don’t let your kids watch the Golden Globes unsupervised. They might catch the shot of Mickey Rourke giving Mike Tyson a kiss which could seriously damage them for life.

Helen Mirren stood and waited before delivering a dramatic opening about life. Using the power of the pause she drew the audience to her and owned the stage.

Reading the teleprompter caused undue problems. Presenters squinted to read their lines… Robert DeNiro only came alive when he joked about Martin Scorsese having sex on the Internet. The rest of the time, his prompter reading was embarrassing… Even Tom Hanks, the consummate professional sounded canned and rushed when he read the prompter.

Bad camera pans were distracting, but at least made us realize the show was live. The flip side was watching a retrospective of Martin Scorsese’s film clips. What a master artist, filmmaker and shaper of the Industry.

Another class act was John Lithgow when he bounded up on stage and perfectly listed the names of everyone who worked with him on Showtime, Dexter and his close circle of influence. He was prepped, rehearsed and ready to go… His co-star, Michael C. Hall (battling cancer) eloquently acknowledged his cast and crew with how much it meant for him to “go to work in a place where everyone gives a damn.”

Chloe Sevigny had a great line about being cast as a polygamist in the series Big Love. “I remain eternally confused and grateful.”

Christoph Waltz (who won an award for his supporting role in Inglorious Basterds) started by saying “A year and a half ago I was exposed to the gravitational pull of Quentin Tarantino… ” and although the rest of the speech could have been delivered more effectively, you have to appreciate the creative crafting he applied to his two minutes of fame.

Loved Martin Scorsese’s tribute to the Hollywood Press Association for restoring old movies that meant so much to him, and paying tribute to past filmmakers, “walking in their footprints” or relating his own personal “powerful cinematic experiences” to the works of DeMille, Ford, Bergman or Kurosawa… And topping it off using a quote from Faulkner “The past is never dead. It’s not even past” is why he’s a master.

Sandra Bullock combined humor, specific references to everyone who made her movie Blind Side a success, and even included a bit of German in a gracious acceptance speech.

Loved Robert Downey’s speech, putting down everyone, not thanking everyone, and quoting William Faulkner with “art in the blood is liable to take the strangest form and now I’m one of them.” (referring to the Hollywood Foreign Press) He had a fun time and we all went along for the ride.

For a lifetime of work, Jeff Bridges received a standing ovation, then began his acceptance speech with “You’re really screwing up my under appreciated status”. His acknowledgment of everyone involved was heartfelt, specific, and memorable– even his stand-in. We don’t see Jeff enough! Hopefully that will now change.

In terms of balance, the speech was a blend of emotion and intellect. Obama spoke of the terrible sacrifice of the thirteen soldiers, but also emphasized the respect for due process and assured our nation that justice will be appropriately delivered. He took the time to humanize each of the fallen soldiers, including specific visual details. He shared how one played the guitar, another was born in Thailand, and yet another was pregnant with her first child and excited about becoming a new mother. By delivering a snapshot of their lives and expressing their aspirations and hopes, he elevated them in stature which made their deaths even more tragic. This neither idealized nor reduced them, but made us appreciate how similar they are to each of us, and how deep their loss is to their families.

In Own the Room, we stress the importance of including visual details so that audiences will ‘play the movie’ in their heads when listening to a speaker. Throughout his address, Obama included phrases like “blinding deserts” and “snowy mountains” to trigger our imagination and picture these images.

Clearly, President Obama is no stranger to rhetoric. Rather than delivering his message in a folksy or conversational tone, his speech reflects a familiarity with age-old speaking skills to motivate and inspire an audience. For example, the use of Tricolon (or triplicate) favored by the ancient Greeks and Roman orators is in evidence multiple times throughout his speech. As Americans, we are comforted with lists or phrases that are bunched in threes. It is pervasive throughout our culture—from nursery rhymes to church sermons. Obama used triplicate when he started three linked phrases with “every evening…”, “every dawn…” and “every moment…” He used the technique again with “in an age”… “in an era…” and “in a time…” And his final Tricolon (referring to the Marines) began with “They have served…”, “They have stood watch…” and “They have extended the opportunity of Government….” Repeating a phrase or trigger word three times has the incantatory, reverential quality that moves us. The device elevates language.
But including triplicates, visual details and a balance of emotion and intellect isn’t enough. In moments of great import, true leaders make us feel connected to a greater human community and ready to rally together. As our Chief Executive Officer, Obama crystallized the range of emotions we are feeling and made us proud to be Americans.

In a time when great stature is required, leaders need the skills of a statesman– not the paltry toolkit of a politician. Hackneyed phrases don’t move us. Polished delivery doesn’t inspire us. And defaulting to what’s safe and expected falls on deaf ears. President Obama needed to deliver balm to a grieving nation. He walked a verbal tightrope and the result was memorable.

After eight years of listening to a President garble simple words and sentences, we now have an accomplished debater with a command of rhetoric and his vocal instrument. However, there is a delicate balance—because if the American public senses that Obama’s easy delivery denotes a lack of authenticity, his skills undermine the message.

Like a Broadway actor who performs the same show eight times a week, President Obama must keep stripping away the veneer that results from multiple speaking engagements. Like a trained actor, he needs to ask himself, “what do I want—right now; and why is this important to me?” Only then can he put himself back into the moment and bring spontaneity, immediacy and presence back to his speaking. This is how he will connect to a nation hungry for leadership.

As history has proven, it is never the most “elegant” speaker who wins hearts and minds. It is one who can speak unadorned, with passion and a clear point of view. The voice that connects with us is the voice that sounds like our own conscience. When we listen to Obama, we want to believe our better self is speaking to us, urging us to take the action that we know is right for ourselves and others.

President Obama, with all his rhetorical gifts, must do what’s counter intuitive. Rather than listing specific debate points, he needs to share what he believes in and why. For example, when rallying the country around health care reform, we recommend he deliver a simple theme that resonates with both sides of the aisle. This theme should reflect his ideology and conviction, e.g. “we can lead the world in providing medical care.” Only then will Obama exhibit a strength of spirit and resolve that will overtake the naysayers. Only then will we see a change in public opinion. And only then will he “own the debate”.